Ealain

Six years ago today you were born and six months later your dad, my brother, died. I met you once at his memorial. I only saw you for a moment. I heard you crying the whole time. That is all I know of you.

I know that you live in California so I looked up your mom’s name on the online white pages. I found a number that I think might be you; it’s in the same town that your dad died and my dad once told me that your mom’s parents lived there so I’m hoping that you are still living there. I tried calling but got voicemail: one of those electronic voices that don’t tell me whether it is you or not. I’ll try back later.

See, I never got to know your dad well. He was in the Air Force and traveled all over. I have three memories of him in my whole life. But what I knew of him, I loved. He was seventeen years older than me and he got the respect from me that you probably give your big brother. Complete adoration. I regret never knowing him better. That’s one reason I want to try to get in touch with you. I don’t want that to happen with us.

I’ve tried to imagine what you are like and what you look like. I imagine all different varients because I don’t know. I compare you to the other six year olds I know: Effie’s son Mick and Rissy’s daughter Emmy. They’re balls of energy zooming around, growing, and learning so much. That’s how I picture you.

I’ll try calling again tonight. I have it planned out. I’ll ask for your mom, and hopefully the phone number will be right. I’ll tell her who I am and why I’m calling. I’ll ask for her permission to know you, because I know how she feels about my father and that there is a good chance she’ll hang up the phone if she finds out I live with him now.

Sometimes I wonder if you know that I exist. I wonder how much you know about your dad: if your mom relives him by telling you stories or if it is a rough subject for her. I was only his half sister. I only met her once or twice. Maybe I wasn’t mentioned.

Either way, I hope someday you’ll know that I love you even without knowing you at all. Hopefully someday I’ll be able to love you, knowing everything about you.

I’m going to up see my family soon as well as my bestfriend Effie, her dudeperson, and their chitlins. Effie’s oldest, her son Mick, is going to be starting school on the 20th of this month. As in first day of school ever. I was telling Josh, all proud-like since I’m Mick’s non-blood Aunt Skye, and he said: Hey, Emmy’s starting school too! Her and Mick are the same age! They should get married. Then we’d all be related!”

So, I went to Rissy (his sister, Emmy’s mom)’s Myspace and told her the story and said: “Just wanted to warn you that your brother is already planning Emmy’s wedding.”

Rissy responded back and said: “tell him I get to pick the music!!!!!!! LOL!!!!!”

So, I txted Effie and said: “Josh’s sister has a daughter micks age and josh just figured that out last night when I told him Mick is starting school cuz Emmy is too. He said: they should get married! Then we’d all be related. So I messaged his sis to warn her that josh is arranging Emmy’s wedding already and told her the story. She said: just tell him I get to choose the music!! So this side is a go if ur interested. Haha!”

Now, pretty much everyone Effie knows has been popping out baby girls. So, she said: “Haha, mick has eight girls to marry now! I do like the name Emmy though, and if she’s smart like her uncle (Josh).. all the other girls will hafta back off.. Mick needs a good wife..”

I responded and sent Effie to my myspace to go see pictures of Emmy and commented on Rissy’s myspace and told her to go to my pictures and go see Mick. They’re already betrothed and they haven’t even started kindergarden yet.

Josh’s niece and my nephew. Who woulda thought?